| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Arch Of Swords Following CeremonyWalking through the arch of swords following the ceremony was done to ensure the couple's safe passage into their new life together.Bachelor PartyThis was the last chance before his new wife took over the finances for the groom to gather money by gambling for his own future use. Ancient Spartan soldiers were the first to hold stag parties. The groom would feast with his male friends on the night before the wedding. There he would say good-bye to the carefree days of bachelorhood and swear continued allegiance to his comrades.The Best ManMany centuries ago, before the women's rights movement, men who had decided upon a wife often had to forcefully take her with him (or kidnap her) if her family did not approve of him. The groom-to-be would sometimes face resistance from her male family members or from competing suitors who would fight him off. The groom would therefore bring along his "best men" to help him fight for the woman. Today the best man and ushers are honorary positions.Another legend is that during ancient times when women were in short supply, the groom captured his bride-to-be from a neighboring village. The future bridegroom, accompanied by a male companion, seized any young girl who had strayed from the safety of her parental home. Our custom of a "best man" is a relic of that two-man, strong-armed tactic; for such an important task, only the best man would do. A best man around AD 200 carried more than a ring. Since there remained the real threat of the bride's family attempting to forcibly gain her return, the best man stayed by the groom's side throughout the marriage ceremony, alert and armed. He also might serve as a sentry outside the newlyweds’ home. Of course, much of this is German folklore, but it is not without written documentation and physical artifacts. For instance, the threat of recapture by the bride's family was perceived as so genuine that beneath the church altars of many early peoples - including the Huns, the Goths, the Visigoths, and the Vandals - lay an arsenal of clubs, knives, and spears. Breaking Of GlassA Jewish tradition that represents the destruction of the temple in Jerusalem. Many times couple save the pieces of glass from the ceremony in a symbolic box.The Bride's BouquetThe bride's bouquet carries many quaint traditions among the different peoples of the world. Orange blossoms, a favorite of many brides, were at one time, when the Saracens carried them, thought to be a symbol of fertility.The carrying of flowers by the bride has its roots in ancient times when
it was believed that strong smelling herbs and spices would ward off and
drive away evil spirits, bad luck and ill health. Garlic and chives were
also During Victorian times, flowers took on an additional significance as lovers would send messages to each other using different flowers, with each flower having its own meaning. These associations were soon adopted for the bride's bouquet and are still used today by many brides. Traditionally, the bride's bouquet is made of white flowers such as orchids, roses, lilies, gardenias, carnations, or stephanotis. Included in the bouquet are fillers like ferns and baby's breath or ivy to give that touch of green. Bride On Groom's LeftBecause the early Anglo Saxon groom so often had to defend his bride from would-be kidnappers, she stood to his left, leaving his sword-arm free. The "best" warrior in the tribe stood by the groom and was responsible for helping defend the bride, thus the placement for the modern day best man.BridesmaidsInviting women to be members of your bridal party dates back to ancient times. One Roman custom was to dress the bridesmaids in a fashion similar to the bride's to confuse evil spirits trying to kidnap the bride. Bridesmaids also had the role of fending off unsuitable suitors, leaving the bride for her groom. Although the specific functions of being a bridesmaid have changed over time, being the brides support system, confident, defender and friend hasn't.Another legend states that it was once common for the bride, her groom and all their friends to walk together to the church on the morning of the wedding. Afraid that someone, maybe a rejected suitor, would spot the happy couple and put a curse on them. The groom's friends wore clothes almost identical to his, and the women costumed themselves like the bride. These disguises tricked evil wishers into letting the real bride and groom live happily ever after. Today attendants are dressed alike for the beauty and pageantry of the event. The CakeBeginning in early Roman times, the cake has been a special part of the wedding celebration. A thin loaf was broken over the bride's head at the close of the ceremony to symbolize fertility. The wheat from which it was made, symbolized fertility and the guests eagerly picked up the crumbs as good luck charms. This tradition evolved and spread to England in the Middle Ages where the guests of a wedding would bring small cakes and stack them together. During the Middle Ages, it became traditional for the couple to kiss over a small cluster of cakes. Later, a clever baker decided to amass all these small cakes together, covering them with frosting. Thus, the modern tiered cake was born.The three-tier wedding cake is based on the unusual shape of the spire of Saint Bride's Church in London. The bride and groom make the first cut of the wedding cake to signify sharing their life together. Every guest then eats at least a crumb of the cake to ensure good luck. And if a single woman sleeps with a piece of wedding cake under her pillow, she will dream of her future husband. The wedding cake, to be shared by the newlyweds and their guests, signifies the "breaking of the kinship." The brides knife signifies that the new wife is ready to accept the responsibilities of her role as keeper of her own household. As reported in a February, 1840 edition of The London Times, Queen Victoria's wedding cake was more than nine feet in circumference. A second tier arose from this "plateau," supported by two pedestals. On the second tier was a sculpture of the mythical heroine Britannia gazing upon the royal pair frozen at the moment of their exchanging vows. At their feet were two turtle doves (symbolizing purity and innocence) and a dog (representing faithful attachment). Completing the scene were various sculpted Cupids, one of them writing the date of the wedding with a stylus on a tablet. Carrying The Bride Across The Threshold1.) The custom of carrying the bride over the threshold stems from the same belief that aroused the idea of runway carpet and strewing the aisle with flowers and petals. It was an ancient belief that the newly married couple was very susceptible to evil spirits. By carrying the bride and supplying a protective layer between the floor and bride, she would be protected from the ground monster.2.) Generations ago it was considered lady-like for the new bride to be, or appear to be, hesitant to "give herself" to her new husband, whether or not she truly was. At the threshold to the bridal chamber, the husband would often have to carry the bride over to encourage her to go in. 3.) Tradition dictates the new wife must enter her home by the main door, and to avoid bad luck, must never trip or fall. And from that we get the bride being carried over the threshold. 4.) During the days of "Marriage by Capture," the bride was certainly not going to go peacefully into the bridegroom's abode, thus, she was dragged or carried across the threshold. In even earlier times, it was believed that family demons followed the woman and to keep her family demons from going into the groom's home, she was carried across the threshold upon her entering for the first time. After that, the demons could not enter as she would come in and go out of the home. Child AttendantsChildren were originally included in the ceremony to add innocence.Diamond Engagement RingsThese lavish gifts were given by medieval Italians in the belief that the diamond was created in the Flames of Love.Ritual BathA ritual bath is a widespread custom in many European countries, especially in France. The custom symbolizes the purification of the bride of all evil influences - and thoughts of previous boyfriends - from earlier in her life.Bridal ShowersThis event has its roots in Holland. When a bride's father did not approve of the husband-to-be, he would not provide her with the necessary dowry. The brides friends would therefore "shower" her with gifts so she would have her dowry and thus marry the man of her choice. While dowries are long gone today, the practice of giving gifts to the bride-to-be remains.Bridal showers were also meant to strengthen the friendships between the bride and her friends, give her moral support, and help her prepare for her marriage. The idea to give gifts is fairly new, dating from the 1890’s. At one shower, the bride's friend placed small gifts inside a Japanese parasol, and then opened it over the bride's head so all of the presents would "shower" over her. When word of this hit the fashion pages, people were so charmed, they decided to do the same at their showers. The DowryBack when marriages were arranged, the bride was expected to have a dowry. The dowry was money, goods, or estate that she brought to her husband, which was provided by the bride's family. In return, the groom paid a "price" for the bride and promised to provide for and support her.The Engagement RingThe engagement ring symbolizes the promise of a future together, sealed with the giving and accepting of a ring.The diamond engagement ring as we know it has been around since the 1400s and was first found in Medieval Italy. Rings featuring gem stones were popular in the 18th and 19th centuries. Often, the first letter of the stones within the setting spelled out the name of the giver or a word. Another ring known as the Gimmal Ring, was a three part ring which had two clasped hands on it. During the engagement, one part was worn by the bride, one by the groom, and the third by a witness. It was reunited as the brides wedding ring, on the day of their marriage In earlier times, the engagement, or betrothal ring, was a partial payment for the bride and was a pledge of the groom's intentions. Over time, the diamond emerged as the symbol of betrothal because its clarity and brilliance reflected innocence and purity, while it's strength signaled the hope of an enduring love. All wedding and engagement rings are worn on the third finger of the left hand. The vein in this finger was once believed to go directly to the heart which is closely associated with love. Until the 15th century, only kings wore diamonds, as a symbol of strength, courage, and invincibility. In India, where it was first discovered, the diamond was valued more for its magic than its beauty and was believed to protect the wearer from fire, snakes, illnesses, thieves, and great evil. Ancient Greeks believing the fire of a diamond reflected the flame of love, actually thought them to be teardrops from the gods. Ancient Romans also endowed them with romantic powers, believing diamonds to be splinters from falling stars that tipped the arrows of Eros, the god of love. In the Middle Ages diamonds were credited with the power to reunite estranged marriage partners. The Engagement PartyA special party was held to establish a formal contract before family and friends of the intended marriage, known as flouncing. If either changed his mind about the marriage, the other could lay claim to half of his, or her, property. Following a flouncing, the couple could no longer have contact with other suitors.In China, the betrothal was looked upon as a family obligation. If an engaged man died before the wedding, his intended bride was treated as his widow. In Finland, the future bride went door-to-door to receive her gifts in a pillowcase. She was accompanied by an elderly married man, carrying an umbrella (for shelter), and was given a drink at each door. This is why today, an umbrella is used as a decoration to symbolize protection. First KissNo ceremony is complete without the kiss. In fact, there was a time when an engagement would be null and void without one. Dating back from early Roman times, the kiss represented a legal bond that sealed all contracts.The kiss that seals the wedding is much more than a sign of affection. It has long been a token of bonding - the exchange of spirits as each partner sends a part of the self into the new spouse's soul, there to abide ever after. FlowersFlowers were incorporated into the ceremony because they represent fertility, purity, new life and never ending love. Traditionally, bouquets were a mixture of flowers and herbs. Dill was a very popular choice as an herb because it was believed to promote desire. Following the ceremony, the dill was eaten for that purpose.General Good FortuneAn old Scottish belief for good fortune: A bride should be met at the door after the wedding ceremony by her mother, who must then break a currant bun over her daughter's head.A kiss from a chimney sweep is supposed to bring good luck as he has magical associations with the family - the hearth of the fire symbolizing the heart of the family. A horseshoe carried by the bride is considered a symbol of fertility. Bad luck for the bride who looks in the mirror wearing her complete outfit Getting to the ChurchWalking is thought to be the best way of getting to the Church, because there's more of a chance of spotting lucky omens. Seeing a rainbow, having sunshine on the bride, and meeting a black cat or a chimney sweep are all lucky. Of course you could run into some bad omens as well. Bad omens are considered seeing a pig, hare or lizard running across the road (not something we usually have to worry about) or seeing an open grave. Make sure you don't run into any Monks or Nuns either, because they foretell a life of barrenness and a life dependent on charity. Coming home from the church can be equally hazardous.Giving Away The BrideIn Old Times,
female children were deemed to be the property of their fathers. When
it came time for the daughter to marry and her father approved of the
arrangement, he was actually transferring ownership of his daughter to
the groom. Today, it is seen as symbolic of the blessings and support
of her union as a promise of continued trust and affection. Often when
the question is asked by a clergy during the ceremony, "Who gives
this woman to be married to this man," the father's response is,
"Her mother and I."
Since early Roman times, white symbolized a joyful celebration. In the twentieth century white stood for purity. Today it is a symbol of happiness. Groom Gives First VowsBecause he is the initiator, he is the first to state his vow for marriage. As the initiator of the covenant, the groom is to assume the greatest responsibility in the marriage.The HandkerchiefThe wedding handkerchief is often kept and passed down from mother to daughter and from generation to generation. Early farmers thought a bride's wedding day tears were lucky and brought rains for their crops. Later, a crying bride meant that she'd never shed another tear about her marriage. Today, we carry a handkerchief to dab away the tears of happiness and joy.The HoneymoonLegend 1:In ancient times, many of the first marriages were by capture, not choice. When early man felt it was time to take a bride, he would often carry off an unwilling woman to a secret place where her relatives wouldn't find them. While the moon went through all its phases, (about 30 days) they hid from the searchers and drank a brew made from honey. Hence, we get the word, honeymoon. Legend 2: Legend 3: Legend 4. HuppahIn the Jewish religion, the ceremony takes place as the couple stands under an ornamental canopy. This canopy symbolized nomadic tents of Israel and the new home that the couple would soon share.
|
International Traditions and CustomsIn Holland and Switzerland a pine tree, a symbol of fertility and luck, was once planted outside a new couple's home.In South Africa, both bride's and groom's parents carried a fire from the hearths of their own homes and took this fire to the new couple's home to begin the fire in their home. In Armenia, two white doves were set free to symbolize love and happiness. The wedding cake in Bermuda was a multi-level fruitcake and included a small cedar tree on top. This tree was planted and is supposed to grow with the love of the bride and groom. In Japan, brides change their bridal attire several times throughout the wedding day. In England, the bride wouldn't allow her married name to be used before the wedding for it was considered bad luck. In Italy, the groom's tie was cut into pieces and sold to the guests at the reception. The money earned is used for the honeymoon. Flowers decorated the front of the bridal car in Italy so that the bride and groom would have happy travels throughout life together. In Japan, ducks or a goose and gander were included in the processional because they mate for life and are a symbol for fidelity. In Poland, guests paid to dance with the bride and this money is used for the honeymoon. During the reception in Spain, wedding guests danced a special dance and then present gifts to the bride. An early American custom---the bride pinned a small pouch to her wedding petticoat. This pouch contained a small piece of bread, cloth, wood and a single one-dollar bill. This ensured that there would be enough food, clothes, shelter and money for the future couple. In Korea, Wedding ducks are a symbol for a long and happy marriage. Cranes are a symbol of long life and may be represented on the woman's sash. In a Native American wedding ceremony, water is used as a symbol of purification and cleansing. The bride and groom have a ceremonial washing of hands to wash away past evils and memories of past loves. In the Philippines, at a certain point during the ceremony, a ceremonial veil is placed over the groom's shoulders and the bride's head. This symbolizes the unity of the two families into one and is also a prayer for health and protection for the couple during their married life. Italian folklore called for the groom to carry a piece of iron in his pocket on his wedding day to ward off the evil eye. The bride, of course, would wear a bridal veil to conceal her from evil spirits. In present day, the couple shatters a glass or vase at the end of the ceremony and the number of pieces represents the number of years of happy marriage. Many couples also release white doves to symbolize their love and happiness. During a Mexican wedding ceremony, a lazo, or large rosary, is draped around the bride and groom while they are kneeling at the altar. Padrinos, two special relatives the couple has chosen as additional "sponsors" of their wedding (in addition to their parents of course) may also present them with coins (for prosperity), a Bible and a rosary during the ceremony. After the ceremony, lucky red beads are sometimes tossed at newlyweds. And a beautiful reception tradition has all the guests during the couple's first or last dance create a heart shaped circle around them. Flowers are a big part of wedding ceremonies and receptions. The groom is supposed to wear a flower that appears in the bridal bouquet in his button hole. This stems from the medieval tradition of a knight wearing his lady's colors to declare his love. In the Ukraine a mock capture of the bride is carried out at wedding receptions to remind everyone present of the many times their homeland was invaded. And instead of cake, Ukrainian couples share korovai, a sacred wedding bread decorated with symbolic motifs that represent eternity and the joining together of two families. In Scotland, usually about a week before the nuptials, the bride's mother may hold a show of presents for her daughter where all wedding presents that have been received are shown unwrapped and assembled. The gifts are set out with the card of the gift giver. Invitations are to an open house, and this gives the bride and bridal party a chance to get acquainted with the guests before the wedding. After the show of presents, the bride is dressed and garnished in over-the-top costumes, and she may be given things like a baby doll to carry in her arms. Now dressed up, the bride is taken out by her friends around town. The women make plenty of noise by singing and banging pots and pans to herald the bride's status. In Egypt families, rather than grooms propose to the bride and many marriages are arranged. Also in Egypt, the zaffa, or wedding march, is a musical procession of drums, bagpipes, horns, belly dancers and men carrying flaming swords; it's a bright, colorful and musical way to announce the marriage is about to begin. I think that's a custom we should start in the states! In the Czech Republic friends sneak into the bride's yard to plant a tree and decorate it with ribbons and painted eggshells. Legend says the bride will live as long as the tree. Also, brides in the countryside carry on the very old custom of wearing a rosemary wreath, which symbolizes remembrance. Her friends as a wish for wisdom, love and loyalty weave the wreath for the bride on the night before her wedding. In Yemen the bride's female relatives prepare all the food, including small-sweetened fritters, which promise a sweet life for the newlyweds and all who partake. The entire community is invited to join the celebration. Playing music to "gladden the bride and groom" is a sacred duty, so not only do professional musicians play, but performers and guests take turns with the instruments as well! From Germany, during the ceremony, when the couple kneel, the groom may kneel on the bride's hem to show that he'll keep her in line. Then, the bride may step on his foot as she rises to reassert herself. Jumping The Broom
Throwing RiceThe throwing of rice on the couple has always been symbolic of wishing prosperity and good luck. In the Orient, throwing rice means, "May you always have a full pantry." Wheat and other grains are sometimes thrown in addition to rice, thereby also wishing prosperity and lack of want. Each shower bestows "Goodwill Traditions" of wealth upon the newlyweds. To this day, rice remains a token of a life of "plenty."ToastingToasting comes from an ancient French custom of placing bread in the bottom of the glass - a good toaster drained the drink to get the "toast." According to legend, when a bride and groom drink their wedding toast, whoever finishes first will rule the family.The TrousseauMany brides-to-be think of their trousseau as new clothes for the honeymoon. Actually the word trousseau comes from the French word, trousse, which means bundle. The trousseau originally was a bundle of clothing and personal possessions the bride carried with her to her new home. The trousseau includes all of the new items for the household, as well as for the bride herself.Love TokensLove tokens have been given to one another since early times. Today, it could be a poem or song written for the other, are some craft that you loving made for the other. The Pennsylvania Dutch had a charming custom. Couples gave one another hand crafted gifts, useful for their future home. Such things as cake molds, butter prints, carved spoon which were covered with symbols and announcements of their love for one another.The RingThe marriage ring represents a promise for eternal and everlasting love. It is a representation of the promises joining both the bride and groom together. The wedding ring is placed on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was traditionally believed that this finger was a direct connection to the heart---the perfect place to place a symbol, representing eternal love and commitment.The circular shape of the wedding ring has symbolized undying, unending love since the days of the early Egyptians. A primitive bride wore a ring of hemp or rushes, which had to be replaced often. Durable iron was used by the Romans to symbolize the permanence of marriage. Today's favorite is of course, gold, with it's lasting qualities of beauty and purity. In ancient times, when life was much harder and oftentimes shorter, husbands practiced a superstitious ritual to ensure their wives spirits wouldn't leave too soon. The husband would wrap the bride's ankles and wrists with ropes of grass believing this would keep here spirit within her. Over the years, as religious beliefs evolved, the meaning (and material) of the bonds evolved as well. Today, brides thankfully don't bind their wrists and ankles, only their ring fingers, and grooms have adopted the practice as well. The grass gave way first to leather, then stone, then metal, and finally, to gold and silver. Today, the rings symbolize the love and bond between husband and wife. SawhorsingSawhorsing is an Italian tradition. The people in the village would set up a sawhorse, a log and a double handle saw. The newlyweds must saw the log apart with the prompting and cheering of the crowd. When the job is finished and the log cut, it symbolized that the man and woman must work together in all of life's tasks.Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, and a Silver Sixpence in Her Shoe.This good luck saying dates back to Victorian times and many brides try to arrange their wedding attire accordingly.Something Old represents the link with the bride's family and the past. Many brides choose to wear a piece of antique family jewelry or a mother's or grandmother's wedding gown or handkerchief (see above). Something New represents good fortune and success and her hopes for a bright future in her new life. The wedding gown is often chosen as the new item. Something Borrowed is to remind the bride that friends and family will be there for her when help is needed. "Borrowing" is especially important, since it is to come from a happily married woman, thereby lending the bride some of her own marital bliss to carry into the new union. Something Blue is the symbol of faithfulness and loyalty. Often the blue item is the garter. Brides of ancient Israel wore blue ribbons on the border of their wedding cloths to denote, love, modesty and fidelity. These are ideals still associated today with that color. Blue also denotes the purity of the Virgin Mary and is the most popular of all colors. In ancient Israel brides wore a blue ribbon in their hair to symbolize their fidelity A Silver Sixpence in her Shoe is to wish the bride wealth. Some brides still place a penny in their shoe during the marriage ceremony. This bridal custom is the most purely symbolic custom of all and its meaning has remained unchanged throughout the years. Taking Each Other's Right HandThe open right hand is a symbol of strength, resource and purpose. The coming together of both right hands is a symbol that both the bride and the groom can depend on each other and the resources that each brings to the marriage. It also represents the merger of their lives together into one.Tying the KnotThe expression "tying the knot" actually dates back to Roman Times when the bride wore a girdle secured by a knot. On the wedding night, the groom then had the honors of "untying the knot." The couple's lives were then tied together. Rituals of binding were also popular in ancient Carthage. The couple's thumbs were laced together with a strip of leather. In India, the Hindu groom knotted a ribbon around his bride's neck, and once tied, the marriage was legal and binding. For much of history the rope was the most powerful way to connect things and people. So, it made sense to talk about "tying the knot."Unity CandleThe unity candle is a symbol of family unity. Usually a single candle (representing the newly married couple) is lit with two individual candles, each representing the bride's and groom's families.The VeilThe wedding veil, symbolizing a wife's submission to her husband, had it's inception in days of old when a bride stood beneath a canopy to signify she was under the protection of her groom. It wasn't white, as is the custom today, but was yellow in ancient Greece and red in ancient Rome. The veil originally symbolized the bride's virginity, innocence, and modesty. This symbolism has been lost over the years but the veil is still customarily worn.According to tradition, it is considered bad luck for the bride to be seen by the groom before the ceremony. In days when marriages were arranged they rarely saw one another as dating" was not a custom. The lifting of the veil at the end of the ceremony symbolizes male dominance. If the bride takes the initiative in lifting it, thereby presenting herself to him, she is showing more independence. In some Middle Eastern and Asian cultures, the veil was worn to hide the brides face completely from the groom who had never seen her. Only after they were married would the groom be allowed the lift the veil to see his new wife's face. Veils came into vogue in the United States when Nelly Curtis wore a veil at her wedding to George Washington's aid, Major Lawrence Lewis. Major Lewis saw his bride to be standing behind a filmy curtain and commented to her how beautiful she appeared. She then decided to veil herself for their ceremony. A young bride always wore her hair long and loose as a sign of her youth and innocence. Wedding BannsThis is an announcement of an impending wedding in the Catholic Church. This announcement usually takes place for three consecutive Sundays. Its purpose was to inform the public with enough notice of the pending wedding so if anyone objected to the marriage, they could do so.Wedding MarchThe traditional church wedding features two bridal marches, by two different classical composers. The bride walks down the aisle to the majestic, moderately paced music of the "Bridal Chorus" from Richard Wagner's 1848 opera "Lohengrin. The newlyweds exit to the more jubilant, upbeat strains of the "Wedding March" (From Felix Mendelssohn's "A Midsummer Night's Dream.")The custom dates back to the royal marriage, in 1858, of Victoria, princess of Great Britain, and Empress of Germany, to Prince Frederick William of Prussia. Victoria, eldest daughter of Britain's Queen Victoria, selected the music herself. A patron of the arts, she valued the works of Mendelssohn and practically venerated those of Wagner. Given the British penchant for copying the monarchy, soon brides throughout the Isles, nobility and commoners alike, were marching to Victoria's drummer, establishing a Western wedding tradition. White Aisle RunnerThe white aisle runner symbolized God's holiness and walking on holy ground. It is believed that marriage is not just between two individuals but includes the presence of God who is actively involved in the marriage ceremony. |